Friday, September 22, 2006

Too many?

Stephen, who reads this blog in Scotland
and stays in touch via e-mail,
recently sent me this photo of his garage
and a list of the bikes in it. The pile o’ bikes reminded me
of the picture I took last spring (below)
when I had my family’s bikes stashed in the house
during my wife’s garage sale.
At the end of his e-mail, Stephen wrote,
“You can't have too many, can you?”

That started me thinking.
How many bikes is too many?

Then I came up with an answer.My solution, henceforth known as
Tim’s Universal Law of Bicycle Quantification,
is as follows: A responsible bike owner
has exceeded his/her maximum capacity
only when the number of units exceeds his/her ability
to maintain all units in working order.

Units undergoing assembly will be classified
only as parts—not actual bicycles—
until both wheels and a stem/handlebar
have been securely affixed to the frame,
at which point spouses and cohabitants
may legally move such assemblies
to the “bike” category for the purpose of debate.

11 comments:

Linda said...

Nice definition! Ok, then I'm still within the limits. Let's go get a new one! *G* Kidding, but I'm looking forward to some serious service to stay within that definition...

James said...

Sweet, I am also within the limits. I am up to 5 but slimming down to 4 very soon.

Pete said...

But what about that "project bike" that's in need of loving restoration?

Snakebite said...

An old biker once told me, "The number of bikes you need is the number of bikes you have - plus one bike."

Tim said...

I have a couple of those, too, Pete. That's why I designed a loophole into the system. Under my definition, if it doesn't have two wheels and a handlebar attached, it goes in the "parts" category. Remove a wheel and stash it in a corner somewhere.

It's all about creative accounting, my man. It's what keeps America going.

the old bag said...

Great post!

So, is there a correlary having anything to do with available space???

Michelle said...

It's my goal: to keep up with the Jones.

Sooo, you guys STILL have more bikes than I do...

I need more....

AND I DID sell my Cannodale

Add in Tim's theory and I OWE it to myself to get a least 2 or 3 more bikes.

Yeah, you MADE my day!!!

(I'm going bike shopping)

Tim said...

I didn't think about space, TOB. That could get in the way of bike acquisitions.

And Michelle, it's a little weird that you're worried about keepin' up with the Joneses when yer buildin' a damn bike shop in your back yard!

I think you done left the Joneses behind with that project. My "shop" consists of a small workbench and a repair stand that I stash away when when it's not in use.

Jeff said...

I'm glad someone finally defined this! The neighbors always ask me, "So how many now?". I'm not quite positive, but by your definition, I believe I have 19 bikes in my garage. There are a few derelicts in the backyard that aren't ridable. My wife used to question the acquisitions, but now she's up to five bikes herself (5 of the 19)! I justify it to myself by keeping each bike in a certain niche…road bike, hard tail, full suspension, single speed, cruiser, etc.

Jeff said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Michelle said...

What can I say, I'm living the American dream and JUST WANT MORE!

:)