Last time I was in Moab's Rim Cyclery they were selling a bumper sticker printed with a knobby tire track and the words “Your sport sucks.”
Those words always mean more at the beginning of baseball season. I often have at least two or three co-workers who show up wearing team jackets or shirts, and they hunker down in their offices all afternoon with radios tuned into games.
Opening day of baseball season? It’s the opening day for a season of boring office conversations about the previous day’s game. I’ve got news for ya: Yesterday’s game was the same as today’s. And tomorrow’s. And next week’s.
I’ve watched baseball. I’ve also watched paint dry. I’ll take the paint.
Where does a bicyclist get off calling baseball dull? Hey, I don’t pretend that bike racing is a fun sport to watch. Riding a bike is great. Watching somebody else ride is dull, especially if it’s mountain bike racing. Even road races are pretty tedious until there’s a great attack in the mountains or a sprint finish. Big crashes count too, of course.
I’m not a good spectator. I rarely watch any sport. But when I do, it has to be faster-paced than baseball. I mean, this is a game that consists mainly of people failing to hit the ball. Hell, games often go into extra innings because nobody scored in the first nine. And people waste perfectly good summer afternoons on this. Afternoons they could spend riding trails.
A baseball game is 10 minutes of action packed into three hours.
Sorry, baseball fans. Your sport sucks.